Stockholm Syndrome.

If my wishes could come true, then you would know what are the words I am screaming at you behind my closed lips. If my dreams could come to life, then you would know what are the thoughts running through my head. If my prayers could be answered, then you would know what I mean...

I want to be blind so that I do not have to look at our photos when I burn them. I do not have to look at the places we used to go hand in hand to remind me of you. I want to be deaf so that I do not have to listen to anything you are bout to say to me. I do not have to listen to the songs we used to sing together. I want to be senseless so that I do not have to feel your presence...

It kills me to know that we have come to this. What did I do to deserve this? I gave you my heart and soul in everything that I do. You know this very well. I am the best you have ever owned. Yet, you keep treating me like dirt. I feel like I am your arch nemesis. I cannot believe you that this is the man I used to love. You hurt me so much. Non-stop. You wound me. Then you sew it back. When you see my sore ain't getting any better, you pish your finger right in. That is how it is. It has been so for a very long time. Yet, I put up with it all. I thought you could change...

I thought you could be the one for me. I thought you could be the one to love me. I thought you could be the man in my dreams when I was a little girl. I thought I could start a family with you. I thought you could be man enough to love me till the end of time. I thought that you will change some time sooner or later. I thought you still love me. and I thought wrong...

Do you know just how much I love you? );

You keep taking me for granted. You break my heart day and night with your endless cruelty. You get very abusive to me. You are extremely heartless. I told you time and time again that I will be there to help you but you just cannot seem to understand that I truly love you. I kept giving in to you. I tried my best to overlook your mistakes. I did all I could to reach out to you. But, you promised you would change and yet, you can never do. You have proven me that you are not the man I have loved 2 years ago, my dear );

I have lost the man I loved. I have lost the man who treasured my heart. I have lost the man who would cry just by seeing me cry. I have lost the man who will bleed if you know I have bled. I have lost the man who showed me the meaning of Love. I have lost the man who fought so hard for me. I have lost the man who did all that he could just to make me happy. I have lost the man who once loved me...I have lost you, Ben );

I wonder what would it take for you to genuinely change...

Maybe our separation can help you learn where you have went wrong and be a better man for someone else who can love you. I just do not feel that I can be that one anymore... );

P.S: I WILL DEARLY MISS YOU AND EVERYTHING WE USED TO DO TOGETHER );